Liverpool Tales from the Mersey Mouth - A book by John Williams

"This is a wonderful collection of writings by John Williams. While it isn't specifically about the Beatles, they are clearly a part of the story, along with the very fiber and fabric of the city that influenced him and them as well. The pieces are short, well written and filled with a delicious sense of humor that shines in the titles as well as the essays." Jan Perry, Cincinnati Post
"John Williams writes in the language of Liverpool, a Scouse scribe who brings to life the people and places, inner thoughts and outer images, the vigour and vitality and essentially, the iron humour of a unique city." Bill Harry, founder of Mersey Beat

Liverpool Stories

The stories on this site are not included in my book.

The tales are snapshots of my life in Liverpool, the home of the Beatles, and the echo chamber of the Mersey Sound that in the sixties resonated around the planet like an acoustic Tsunami. The stories cover a period of 50 odd years and so they touch on every aspect of my life from the rites of passage to the passing of youth. I hope you enjoy them.

Emporia Fantastica - Memories of a Liverpool store

By John Williams

There used to be a department store in Liverpool called Blackler's. It was an old fashioned emporium that sold everything from books to bed linen, and it used to afford me hours of innocent pleasure as I wandered though its crowded aisles marvelling at the diversity of its products.

One section in particular held an allure that I could never explain beyond the fact that it invariably made me laugh. It sold kitchen gadgets such as tomato slicers, herb cutters and bizarre contraptions such as a multi pronged fork that was designed to be stuck into a peeled onion, and the tines were then used to guide a knife blade, thus facilitating slicing of the said vegetable! I mean, would you?

My favourite gadget ever, and there were many contenders, was a mushroom brush. Yes, a mushroom brush! It comprised a mushroom shaped handle with pure white bristles and was used to brush any soil that may have been adhering to the fungi. The logic behind its design was simple.

Mushrooms are among the most absorbent organisms on the planet, so if you wash them they just absorb water and end up being soggy and unpalatable. What we are supposed to do is brush them clean, and then add the cut mushrooms to a sauce, which will then permeate them with the desired flavours.

Isn't it comforting to think that there are highly trained designers thinking about the welfare of our mushrooms, ceps and fungi in general? And I suppose when they are not engaged in designing cutting edge technology they design the packaging it comes in. Packaging! The curse of modern life. Landfill sites, (what a bizarre notion, filling land!), groan under the weight of plastic containers with a life span measured in millenia while the products have long since vanished.

And can you open this packaging with the same ease that you once un-wrapped a paper parcel? Can you hell! As I get older I get increasingly alarmed at the thought that one day I will have food in the cupboard that is as difficult to access as BT internet on a bad night. I picture myself lying on the floor staring, defeated, at a packet of biscuits that has defied my feeble attempts to rip open the shimmering rigid plastic shrink wrapped sustenance.

I thought I had cracked it when my mother bought me a beautiful pair of kitchen scissors, but I couldn't open the blister pack...

CITIES BENEATH THE SEA

Paper cups and plastic bags

cast-off clothing turned to rags

toilet tissues by the ream

choke city streets

and mountain stream.

Inside the mouths of rivers wide

rusting prams ride out the tide,

while strangely sluggish little fishes

snooze in long abandoned satellite dishes.

Splintered bottles and jagged tins

designed to quench an endless thirst,

lie in wait for exposed skins,

to do their very worst.

Stream feeds the river,

river feeds the sea,

sea feeds the clouds

that rain on me!

1999

My thanks to Tim Kelly and Brigitte C for the new look to my site